Women

It may be true that men don't seem to understand women and it's not (as someone made loads of money for suggesting), because they come from different planets. It's because just like any large group of people, all you can ever know about is one at a time.

Men are full of theories about what women like in a man just as they are about so many things. The folklore of the pub is strongly embedded in the social fabric of this country but unfortunately it often has more to do with what men would like to be true than what is true. I know what I know because I asked some women for their views, the only way to know is to ask. I find that buying drinks works just as well on women as it does on men if you're after an honest opinion. Be brave, ask, talk, discuss, you might be surprised how much you learn.


ONE WOMAN'S VIEW

I choose my men mainly by how they look. It's a good place to start if I'm going to be seen with someone. It takes a while to find out if we have anything in common, sometimes up to an hour. If we don't then it is unlikely that I would see him again unless he was very special in some other way. If he doesn't look good it is doubtful he will get this far. I like men who are funny, kind and thoughtful.

ONE WOMAN'S VIEW
I like a man with a sense of humour and a fit body, not necessarily in that order.

ONE WOMAN'S VIEW
I have always liked strong confident men who are able to look after themselves. I have my own ideas about what good looks are and I know that most of my mates don't agree because we compare notes when we're out. I don't like being treated rough but I sometimes attract that type or I wind them up that way.

ONE WOMAN'S VIEW
When I was younger I liked men who told me what I wanted to hear but this type tend to not know when to start telling the truth. Now if I ask if I look good in something, I expect a true opinion. I don't really care too much what they look like, if I am going to spend time with someone there are more important things.

ONE WOMAN'S VIEW
I like a man to make me feel special and sexy even when I'm not. I like a man that has a good sense of humour and makes me laugh. Looks aren't the essential part of why I like and love a man, it's personality that counts in my book.



A MAN'S VIEW
Like many men I have done some dreadful things to the women who have been in my life, and vice versa. I try harder these days if only because life is easier and pleasanter this way. There is one thing I have learned and I'll share it with you. Ask, ask, ask. Be certain that what you think a woman is indicating to you is what she actually means. Be explicit when you ask. Be aware that the right to change her mind at any point during whatever is happening, even sex. Lets just clarify what the term consent means. It means that a woman is able to give consent. Legally she has to be over 16 years old and not have her judgment impaired by a medical or developmental disorder. On a more common note she should not be drunk or under the influence of drugs, prescribed medicines included. Then when all these conditions are satisfied she must agree to everything that takes place, and she can change her mind at any point. This is important and no matter what it feels like at the time you must stop if she wants you to at any time. It doesn't matter what she is wearing, or even if she is naked, the same rules apply. It can never be true that "you could tell she was up for it by the way she was dressed/acting/dancing" or anything else. Sermon over. Take control, take responsibility.